I'm not lost. I'm taking the scenic route.

A lot of this is a love note to my wife but there will occasionally be a random thought thrown in every once in a while.

Friday, May 26, 2006

Man Attacked By Duck And Lives To Tell About It


The love a mother has for her children is immeasurable. She will go up against the largest of foes when she feels her children are in danger. At the same time, a father will dare great perils to try and look cool to his kids. The following example of this actually happened. No parents or children were hurt in this adventure.
On the same night that we say the crazy ladie trying to drive up the pole we were at a park in downtown OKC. There is a large pond there where ducks and geese stay. We had taken some food to feed them. There was a mother duck there with her three ducklings. They were extremely cute and the girls were going nuts over them. They were alomost getting close enough for us to feed out of our hand. Finally the girls started trying to feed the geese. I stayed with the ducks. I was able to get between them and the pond and catch one of the ducklings. My plan was for the girls to pet the baby duck. What I did not plan on was the ferocity with which the mother would protect her young. I am a big guy at six feet three inches and 220. Ok, 235 and this duck may have weighed all of 8 pounds. This duck starts to FREAK OUT!!! It is flying at me hitting me in the head and back. Joy and the girls start screaming at me, "Put the duck down! Put the duck down!" I said, "I want the girls to pet it." Joy comes back with, "Put the duck down before you get hurt!" (Yes there was laughter at this point) I had been beaten. I put the duck down and they all ran away from me. After much chastisement from Joy and my daughters I tried to make piece with our feathered friends. I put some more food down for them but the mother duck put her nose in the air, showed her butt to me and took her babies into the water and swam to the other side of the pond. I had been snubbed. I walked away with a shame I will carry forever.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

If You Don't Like The Way She Drives, Stay Off The Sidewalk


The girls wanted to take Joy on a picnic for Mothers Day so we went to a park downtown. On the way back home we drove by a department store and saw the craziest thing. Someon in a Chevy p/u had driven UP a stop sign. Thats right, I said up a stopsign. It was so incredible that we circled back to look closer. We pulled into the parking lot and parked in the closest spot possible and just sat there and took pics. There was a tow truck there that was trying to pull the truck off the sign post but there was a concrete sleeve that went up about 3 feet at the bottom of the pole. As the tow truck is pulling the truck down the pole that sleeve catches the lower radiator hose and rips it off causing all the fluid to spill out. There was laughter in the van so loud we had to roll the windows back up. It was getting close to the time for American Idol and Joy wanted to go home and watch. I told her there was no way we were going to miss this and that she could see who won online tomorrow because this was a ounce in a lifetime deal and we were not going to miss this. The tow truck kept pulling backwards until the sleeve caught the bumper. I just knew they were going to rip the front of that truck off so I had Joy get ready with the camera. To my disappointment they stopped and rethought their idea. The tow truck then went around to the front and picked the front of the truck off the sing post and pushed it backwards off the cement collar. After that they just backed the truck off the sign and left nothing more to see.
I cannot help but wonder how she did that? I mean she had that truck so far up that pole her bumper was on the stopsign! she must have swerved left, and then swerved right but the sign still hit her.

What Exactly Did You Expect?


http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060516/ap_on_fe_st/netherlands_bear_eats_monkey

To get the full effect of this blog you must read the story on the link above.

Good that was fast. This story was so funny to me. They put predator and prey in the same area so it is more like their natural habitat and then get suprised when act like thay do in the wild. Do these people think that ALL animals whether in a zoo or in the wild get fed by nice people with pales of food and a garden hose for water? Or have they seen Disney movies like "The Lion King" to many time and think that only bad an mean animals kill for their food? Oh the horror! A bear killed a monkey and ate it! Shut up. Whay kind of dumb monkey gets killed by something called a 'sloth bear' anyway? It has to be called a sloth for a reason. Maybe it isn't that fast a moving bear? I honestly do not know. But if so, think about how slow that monkey was. All I am saying is why be suprised when a bear kills a monkey and eats it. People do that kind of stuff all the time. Have you ever seen what a hamburger is attached to before it in the grocery store? That's right, it's called a cow. Maybe if the bear's had currency and they could go and buy a butchered monkey the visitors at the zoo would not have been so shocked to see them 'go shopping for food.'

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Name Game Friday. Ok, It's An Hour Early.

IT'S NAME GAME FRIDAY!
Here is a funny little survey you can do real quick....



1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and current street name)

Snoopy Drexel. I am a drummer for a glam rock band.


2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your dad's side, your favorite candy)

Buster Chocolate. Sounds more like a Porn Movie Star name.


3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME: (first initial of first name, first two or three letters of your middle name)

M Ed. Great, I am Mr. Ed.

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: ( favorite color, favorite animal)

Blue Dolphin. I sound like a detective that could not find his butt with both hands.


5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Edward Oklahoma City. It's funny that I actually used to go by this name when I played professional poker.


6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (first 3 letters of your last name, last 3 letters of mother's maiden name, first 3 letters of your pet's name)

Ket Mer Chl. This is stupid.


7. JEDI NAME: (middle name spelled backwards, your mom's maiden name spelled backwards)

Drawde Sremmus. Makes no sense. Jedi are like these greeat holders of wisdom yet they can't come up with a name that can be spelled.


8. SUPERHERO NAME: ("The", your favorite color, the automoblie you drive)

The Blue Escort. Jeez I miss my Dodge truck.

Missing You

I haven't really talked about two people that mean a lot to me. I don't ever get to see or talk to them and they really don't know who I am or what I am like. I am sure it is my fault. The sad thing is that they may never know. That hurts me because it also means I may never know them. I may never get to know what they like to do, see them play sports,teach them how to drive, be there when they go to their first prom or be invited to see them get married. I wonder about them quite a bit. In my mind I am part of their lives. They think about me every day and mean to call but get busy and never get a chance. They have a picture of me in their rooms and tell their friends who I am. Their friends always say, "Wow, that's pretty cool." (It's my fantasy)

Ari & Connor I think about you every single day. I miss and love you both.

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Down Time? Who Has Down Time?

I have been busier than a one legged man in a butt kicking contest lately. Between work, running the kids where they need to go, taking care of my yard and mowing two other yards I have not had time to sit down and blog. Not that anything exciting has happened as I have pretty much described what has been going on. Even the weekends are full of something. Special little projects have to be put off until I have more "free time." Then, God forbid, it rains and I am stuck in the house. It has rained like every other day here for the last two weeks. I swear I am getting webbed feet. The other day Joy felt like we were living in Seattle and should go see the space needle.
Boring you say? Yes it is but this is my life right now and sometimes boring is good.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Cool Dad Moment 1007.

I am tucking the girls in last night for bed and after I say Sara's prayers with her she asks me, "How big is God?" I told her that God was bigger than everything because He made everything. Her response was what every father loves and hates to hear. "Is He big like you daddy?" That stopped me dead in my tracks. Immediatly I was aware of every terrible thing I had done and said. My tiny daughter was comparing me to God. What does a dad say to that? Knowing that I can never fill God's shoes (Does God wear shoes?) I tell her how God made the Sun and the Earth and all the animals and Adam. She really latched onto the Adam part. It was the dirt part that got her. She touched her long, beautiful brown hair and said, "How did He make hair?" I was stumped. How did God make hair? Where did he get the idea for a furry covering for our heads? Why do dome people not have a furry covering for their head? Do they not need it? All I could come up with was, "He made that part of the dirt make hair." Luckily she is 6 and that was enough of an answer.
I hope my wife gets the "Where do babies come from question" question. I do not think I will be able to handle that one with the grace that she can.
 
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