I'm not lost. I'm taking the scenic route.

A lot of this is a love note to my wife but there will occasionally be a random thought thrown in every once in a while.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Christmas Has Left The Building!

Another Christmas has come and gone. I love the holidays but I am always glad when they are gone too. Families come over and eat, mess up the house, take a nap and then leave. This year was a little different though. Nobody took a nap. My in-laws came over and we had our Christmas thing and then we broke out the Ouzo. Ouzo is a magical elixir that tastes like licorice and kicks your ass like tequila. My brother-in-law had maybe two glasses of that and the other one had about five glasses of wine. To say they were both very loose would be putting it mildly. They are both excellent musicians and started playing guitar in the living room. I wish I was good enough to play with them, I think it would make my wife love me more. My brother-in-laws were not the only ones to enjoy a little libation. My wife also needed a little shot of "holiday lubricant" whilr her family was here. She would rather be a little more subtle than her brothers so I was mixing her eggnog with Southern Comfort. This was letting minor offenses slide off her back because usually a family get together has to have at least one heated discussion about something. I will give an example of how well this worked. Her dad wanted everyone to wait around until his girlfriend got to the party. She was 2 hours late and people were ready to go. Instead of fighting with her dad my wife says, "Please make him some eggnog and put a little Southern Comfort in it so he will chill out. He will never know it is in there." I was more than happy to ablige. Here is the kicker to this story. My father-in-law is a retired baptist evangelist. If you are aware of the Baptist belief system they feel that any kind of intoxicating beverage is of the devil and is a one way tivket to hell. Even over the guitars I could hear them adding another offense over the door to my room in hell. It wasn't enough to mess him up but it did chill him out so mission accomplished.
Perhaps the funniest thing I saw that night was my wife sitting not 3 feet away from her dad schnockered. I am not talking about falling down, slurring your words drunk, but definetly feeling the effects of three glasses of Southern Eggnog. I wish I had a picture of the "I am drunk in the same room as my father and he has no idea" smile on her face. Priceless.


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